I shall tell you of the story of the Battle of BC Place. Statisticians from the Major League will say I am liar, but stats are recorded by those who have sent off heroes. King Zlatan stayed home, safe and secluded in his Californian Castle, while the King of Cascadia was abroad, watering the meadows of France with Tunisian tears.

In the absence of King Kendall, the Cascadians were ably led by General Efrain Juárez, while Sebastian Lletget was at the head of the invading force. From the start, the Californians dug in. Between their wounded, and those who had deserted over battlefield concerns, they were in no position to wage an offensive campaign.